crazy times...

Sorry it's been so long...
The last few weeks have been crazy and I have had neither time, energy nor motivation to write on here. Okay, so the last you knew was that there was a possibility that one of the teachers would leave PROMESA. Sadly, that happened, for reasons beyond anyone's control. It was hard to see her go. We're hoping she'll be able to come back next year and teach again. 2 days before Luz left, Leo walked in off the street, said he'd heard that we were looking for a teacher and wondered when he could schedule an interview. It just so happened that Ron had free time right then (some sort of minor miracle), so they did the interview on the spot. To make a long story short, we now have a new third grade teacher and Ron has some male companionship on the teaching team.
The downside to Luz leaving (besides the fact that she isn't here anymore) is that it was very hard for the kids. Because of all the uncertainty that accompanied her leaving, the students didn't actually even know until the morning of her last day. I think that made it even harder for them. They expressed a lot of feelings of rejection, fear, anger, sadness, and insecurity over the days following her leaving. Some of those feelings came out in increased measures of bad behavior. The first week was the worst and they've been gradually getting better since then.
I think it's been a combination of many things that have made the last few weeks difficult. The middle of the year has come and gone. Things that have been bugging me over the last few months (talking in class, not doing homework, playing with things in their desks during class, etc) have built up to a frustration level. One of my students has some emotional and behavioral needs that are beyond what I can help in the middle of class with 20 students. I'm spending a lot of time working and planning. I'm tired.
And yet, in the middle of all this, I have found God's grace to be so great. I have been amazed and in awe of it so many times. I have been finding new depths of grace as I need more of it. And it has been beautiful.
This past week has been easier. I had a very relaxing weekend. I got a lot of exercise, which felt good. I got a guitar, so I've been playing and worshipping with that this week. And then, on top of that, on Monday and Wednesday, there was a transportation strike and we didn't have school either day. Those two days, I had some time to spend with friends and get some things done. And I had a break from nixy kids. So I am feeling better and I feel like I have more hope.
September is here. And with it comes the rainy season and the coming of spring. I felt today like maybe with the coming of a new season outside will come a new season in the classroom as well.
So I will keep pressing on and living in the middle of God's grace, learning more about Him.

Why Snakes are Wise

I discovered a treasure the other day. The Museo Inca (Inca Museum) off the Plaza de Armas is well worth the small entrance fee. There is a wealth of information contained therein. My friend Alicia is studying tourism and was working at the Museo Inca for a while. Saturday was her last day there, so she took my friend Marisol, Carrie and I around the museum. It was a great learning experience. There were many things that I learned (several that really stuck out to me), and one I wanted to share.
The Inca trinity of animals that they worshipped were the condor, the puma and the snake. The condor was representative of the heavens and of freedom. The puma was representative of the earth and of strength. And the snake was representative of the underworld and of wisdom. I naively assumed I knew why the snake represented wisdom (after all...now the snake was more cunning than all the other creatures God had created, right?). But when Alicia asked why we thought, that wasn't it. She proceeded to explain why the snake represents wisdom.
Gliding her hand from side to side, curving back and forth, she represented the movement of the snake. The snake, she explained, represents wisdom because it moves back and forth, weaving in and out. In the same way, as we go throughout life, moving back and forth, going in and out among many various people and interactions, we gain wisdom. Just like the snake goes back and forth, so do we and as we do, we gain wisdom.
I'd never thought about it that way before, but when she said it, it made perfect sense. Often I realize that life is a process here. In order to do anything, it seems there is a process to do and prerequisites that need to happen first. And I weave in and out, back and forth. And many times, in the process, there are interactions with other people. Weaving in and out, back and forth, gaining wisdom. Might not be anything profound or life-changing, but there are always interactions, always experiences. There is always this moving in and out, back and forth, collecting, gleaning, learning, experiencing. And so wisdom is gained and things are learned. In and out, back and forth, ever gliding on, like the snake.
And that is why, at least in the worldview of the Incas, snakes personify wisdom.

PROMESA wish list

Let me give you a wish list for PROMESA (in other words some items for prayer), as we go back for the second half of the school year:
1) A third grade teacher - Luz, our third grade teacher, just informed Ron over the break that she will be back for one week after break and then she is leaving us to take another job. It's a very complicated situation and I'm not sure anyone really understands it completely (besides Luz). But anyway, we need a third grade teacher (or wisdom to know if throwing another teacher into the mix isn't the best idea for whatever reason).
2) A director - Luz is also the director of the school, so now we need to find someone else to fill that role. A Peruvian is pretty much necessary because of understanding the educational system and all the paperwork, etc.
3) Creativity and flexibility for the rest of us - until we get another teacher (if we decide that's the best option for everyone), the rest of us need to cover the third grade classes. Ron and I may have to cover third grade for a while, which will require massive amounts of creativity and also extra energy.
4) Land for the school - we are rapidly outgrowing our facilities in the San Jeronimo church building. And we are expanding every year. We are starting to feel that the church is ready for us to move out and find our own space. This would also help us to feel more established and stable as a school. It is hard for teachers to feel they have job security since we are so small and don't have our own place, etc.
At this point, I think that's my wish list for PROMESA. It's going to be an interesting rest of our school year. PROMESA, PROMESA, God shed His grace on thee.

Felices Fiestas Patrias

Happy Peruvian Independence Day! Today, July 28, is the official date, though celebrations have been going on for several days now and will continue for at least one more after today. Most people are off work today and all the schools suspend classes for today and tomorrow. Throughout the last few weeks in schools all around Cusco, students have been practicing traditional dances to celebrate the special occasion. PROMESA is no exception to this. The classroom teachers (those who teach in Spanish) and Carrie have all been working very diligently to teach their students dances from the three geographic regions of Peru: coast, mountains and jungle. Shannon, Marisol (the computer teacher) and I were put in charge of decorations since we didn't have classes to teach dances to. Every spare minute (and some not so spare ones) was spent learning the steps of the dances. Traditional clothing can be rented here in a number of little stores. Since this is a high-demand time of year, the price was 8 soles a person (roughly $2.50 - $3 American). Normally, it's about 7. At El Molino (think the number of stores in a typical American mall, one right next to the other, each one about 3 meters long by 4 meters tall by 3 meters deep - roughly - jam packed floor to ceiling with stuff) you can buy pirated DVDs of traditional music and dances for a little over 1 sol (roughly $.50 American). So that's what the teachers did, since having someone come teach the kids would have been very expensive and out of PROMESA's budget. Everyone did really well. There were PowerPoint slide shows about the various regions of Peru, highlighting some of the flora, fauna, typical foods, and typical dances. And then there were the dances. These kids can really dance! Oh of course, it wasn't perfect. There were wiggly kids. And there were kids who just plain didn't want to cooperate. And there were kids who forgot what they were supposed to say. But I was proud of them! They did a great job.
For your viewing pleasure, here are some pictures of the program. Ron (the missionary who works with the school) taught the elementary students all how to sing "We Want to See Jesus Lifted High" in English and Spanish. I filmed it on my camera, but it's too big to put on here, so here's a link to YouTube where you can see that, if you're interested.
Also, just in case you were ever curious, here is a link to learn about and hear the Peruvian national anthem
This comes with a warning, however. It usually gets stuck in my head and then I go around the house...or the school...or walking down the street...singing it. :)

The pictures are as follows (sorry, Blogger doesn't let me put captions directly with the pictures): Top: Aaron, one of my fourth graders, holding the flag while the parents sang the national anthem.
Kindergarteners dancing the marinera from the coast
Second graders dancing from the coast
Some of the third grade girls dancing from the jungle.
First graders (the little girls with the colorful caterpillar-like things) dancing from the mountain region
Four-year-olds (dressed like animals) dance about life in the jungle
Katy and Nurieth, two of my fourth graders, ready to dance. Katy danced the boys' part because fourth grade has 8 girls and 5 boys.
My third grade boys show their true colors pretending to be jungle natives. Sometimes they act like it in class too! :)
Fourth graders dancing (they're the ones with the big hats with straw on them).
And for those of you who miss seeing my face, here is a picture of me with Crhisnna, one of my fourth graders.

Blessed

I read a quote once: "You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you, there is more of God." That quote would pretty well sum up this last week or two of teaching. We've now been in school for almost 5 months and the mid year, 2-week break is coming up after the end of next week. I think it's time. I think the kids think it's time too.
The last few weeks, I have come to the end of my rope. I have discovered that in myself, I don't have the patience I need to be a teacher. I have discovered that in myself I don't have the love for my students that I need to have. They do things. They bug me. They get under my skin. And then...well, let's just say teaching's not quite as fun then. But in this discovery, I've also discovered something else. God does have the grace and patience, love and creativity that I need in order to work with my kids. When mine is all spent, I can rely on His. And it seems the more spent mine is, the more His kicks in.
Take Tuesday for example. Monday and Tuesday were not very good days with third grade, especially. I was trying to be patient. I was trying to be loving. But it's hard when you feel like you're talking to yourself because no one else is listening. And then to top it all of, on Tuesday, right before leaving to come home, I realized that two boxes of crayons were missing from my desk. That did it. I came home furious.
"God," I complained, "I work and work. I spend so much time planning and thinking and trying to come up with creative ideas to work with these kids. And it's like they throw it back in my face. I make stuff and it gets destroyed. God, this isn't fair!" And then, ever so gently, He reminded me that, hmmmm......sometimes I do the very same thing to Him. And how does He respond versus how I tend to respond? And then, He gave me His presence and peace. The next morning, I arrived at school still quite upset and not quite sure I was ready to face a room full of 20 third graders. And again, God was faithful to take over where my rope ended. As I stood before 20 wiggly 7 and 8 year olds, God gave me this incredible calm and lack of frustration. I was able to explain to them what had happened and how we wouldn't be able to work on a specific project until the crayons were found and returned to my desk. And you know, they stopped being wiggly third graders and they paid attention! That was the turning point for the week so far in my interactions with third grade.
Wednesday came and went an there were no crayons revealed. I was wondering if they would in fact show up in the end. But lo and behold, Miriam found the last 5 crayons this afternoon in a box of papers and things.
Throughout the last couple of weeks, God has made it apparently clear in many situations that I need to rely on Him instead of my own strength. I don't have what it takes to be an amazing teacher and to reach students. But, as He keeps reminding me, He does have the strength, grace and peace that I need and that He will only give it to me if I ask.
So maybe I am at the end of my rope. But I've been so blessed by receiving from God the last few weeks. Not that I want third grade to be bad just so I can receive more from God...heaven forbid!) But I've been finding God to be incredibly faithful in the midst of all that's going on. I've realized how much I need to lean on Him and trust Him.
Paul said something similar in 2 Cor. 12.9, where God says to him, "My grace is sufficuent for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness". It's my life verse and I think it's becoming more and more so the longer I live and the more times I can feel God's presence with me when I'm clinging for all I'm worth to the very end of my rope. We truly serve an amazing God!

Manuela´s Miracle

I guess you could call it a miracle. You may remember the other week, I shared about Manuela and Valentin, two older members of my church in Huacarpay. They had gotten married, but they had to push up their wedding a week because Manuela was not doing well and no one was sure how much time she had left.
Well, Manuela is still very much alive. And what´s more, she´s getting better! Manuela has cancer. From what I understand, it started in her eye. But it´s spread throughout her whole body now. The doctors say there´s really nothing they can do for her. So she´s living with cancer. For a long time now, her face has been covered with ugly scabby wounds, supposedly from the cancer. And she has a quite large wound in her eye where she has the cancer. It is always covered with a clean gauze pad, thanks to several of the women from the church. The last few weeks, the wounds on her face have actually been getting better and the scabs have been falling off! Her skin is, in the words of Ines, the pastor´s wife, like a baby´s. And indeed, when I saw her this morning, she looked much better. Someone quoted her husband as saying, "She´s getting pretty!".
And that´s not all. After church, some of us were discussing it again and someone said that now she can actually see out of her bad eye and that apparently it´s getting better, or at least better than it had been. Someone said this morning that Manuela said the other day that now she really believes in the power of God because she´s seeing it first hand.
It´s been exciting to see Manuela´s miracle and to know that God is reaching down to her tiny house in her tiny village in the middle of Peru and is touching her body and bringing restoration to her. What an amazing Father!

Life as normal

I've often wondered what normal is. I've begun to think it's a social construct. Normal depends on where you are and what society around you says. Often I think "Oh, there's not much to write about. Life is going on as normal". And then I realize that normal here is different from normal in the States. So I thought I'd write about normal life here in Peru to give you an idea of what normal is like for me these days. Peru is a relationship-oriented culture, which means that spending time with people occupies a lot of my days. Often these times with friends happen very spontaneously, thus inciting the comment from John Kreider, a fellow missionary, that here in Peru, things are set in Jello, as opposed to cement.
Case in point, I began this blog entry this morning, then received a call from one of my friends inviting me to go play racquetball with her and some other friends. Since today was a transportation strike, I walked for an hour and a half to get there, then wandered around being lost until I found them and played racquetball for about an hour before having to head home for a missionary team meeting. Now it's evening and I'm still updating my blog. :)
If you'd look at my proposed agenda in my head at the beginning of the week, it would look very different from what actually happens by the end of the week. A typical day in my mental agenda looks like this: wake up, go to school, come home from school, spend time with Marga doing what needs to be done around the house, work on schoolwork, go to bed. However, a typical day generally actually goes somewhat more like this: wake up, go to school, at school learn that someone wants to do something together in the afternoon or needs help with English, come home from school, do something with someone, do a little schoolwork, go to bed.
But there are many blessings that come with being a part of such a culture. Sometimes these times of spending time with people doing whatever we're doing are the best times to really get to know someone and/or make memories. The other week, I came home from school and Marga asked me to help her make wedding cakes for a wedding that was to be the next day. Valeria, who was supposed to make the cakes, had to travel, so she had asked Marga to make the cakes. Valeria has a large wood-fueled oven in her house, so we could bake them all at once and do it very quickly. So we went to Valeria's house, where we met up with about 4 other people. Working together, we mixed up 10 large cakes in a very short amount of time. Then we stuck them in the oven. 5 minutes later we quickly took them out of the oven because the oven was way too hot and the tops burned black in the short amount of time that they were in there. We covered them with wet pieces of paper and finished baking them. As they came out of the oven and cooled, Frida cut the burned parts of them off with a knife. They turned out fine! But it was definitely a bonding experience for all of us. We had lots of laughs trying to figure out how to fix our problem and what we were going to tell Valeria.
And then there was the conversation I had with Marisol the other week, walking from school to where she needed to get a combi to go home. We were able to share from the heart as we walked along, eating popsicles. It was totally a spontaneous, spur-of-the-moment thing, but it was so great! Another day the same week, Marisol asked me for help with English, so we went downtown and ate pizza, then spent a while working on English. She also decided she wanted to get her hair cut, so the next evening we went downtown again and spent time at our friend Norma's styling salon.
And then Juana calls sometimes wanting help with English homework. So she'll come over and we'll spend more time talking and catching up with where each other's at and what's going on than actually working on English.
When I'm in Huacarpay the same phenomenon happens. I have yet to get out to Huacarpay and right off the bat have worship team practice. I doubt it will ever happen. I usually get there and no one's at the church. So I walk down to Rene's house, where something is always going on. This past week I got there only to find her in the midst of making her son's birthday lunch for the next day (which I had no idea about but ended up going to). Once that was finished, then we had worship team practice. And then I usually go back to Pastor Celestino and Ines's house and crash there for the night, spending time with their family.
Living life relationally is very different from living life in a planned, structured way. Sometimes I wish I'd have more time to work on schoolwork. But then I think about all I'd miss out on if my mental agenda looked more like my actual agenda. And then I decide I'm really actually glad that I live in this new kind of normal, where people come first and relationships are forged in the midst of these spontaneous times of togetherness. It's a blessing and the energy I pour out is more than replaced by the energy generated by friendship and fellowship.
So when I say my life is normal, what I really mean to say is that I am forging relationships in the midst of this culture and feeling very blessed to have the opportunity to do so.

There will be great rejoicing...

She walked up to the front of the church. A tiny country church trying to bridge the changing cultures of the Andes and modern Western culture, a mixture of young people in jeans who speak mostly Spanish and older people in more Andean styles who speak more Quechua. I know her. I danced with her at the church service. Her name is Gabriela. It surprises me to see her here, now. Humbly, brokenly, she announced her desire to accept Jesus into her heart. With tears streaming down her cheeks and her voice catching in her throat, she prayed, standing up front with Pastor Celestino and his wife Ines. And Jesus came. Just like the song we sang in Quechua earlier in the morning, which Ines translated roughly for me: "As he was going to the cross, Jesus said to me, 'I'm dying so that you don't have to'". Joy filled my heart as I listened to her pray and as I felt the Holy Spirit's presence there. As Gabriela prayed, another woman came down the aisle. Gently supported by two others, she came, clutching a crutch, limping badly. Juana, sitting beside me, explained that this woman was pregnant and didn't take care of herself. About a month ago, she gave birth and hasn't been well since. A chair was brought and she sat at the front of the church, expressing the same desires as Gabriela. The church extended hands of blessing and healing over her. As I was praying for her, I was reminded of the story of the healing of the paralytic from Mark 2. It was preached about several times recently and what stuck out to me was Jesus' question: "Which is more difficult: to say 'Your sins are forgiven' or to say 'Take up your bed and walk'?" For us as humans, both are equally difficult. However, for God, both are equally possible. I would have loved to see her be healed physically. That didn't happen, but she went away from church yesterday with a far greater healing. She was healed spiritually. God must have a greater plan...
All I know is that, slowly but surely, the kingdom of God is expanding in Peru and God is bringing precious souls into His kingdom, for His glory and for the praise of His name.

My weekend in Huacarpay

After praying about how I could get involved with my church in Huacarpay and talking with some others, I decided to get involved in the worship ministry. Because of the dance and other things that I was involved in, I haven't been able to begin my ministry with them until this weekend. And what a weekend it was. Because Huacarpay is a relatively good distance from my house and it's not necessarily safe for me to travel by myself back home at night, a trip to Huacarpay at any time after about 5 PM usually involves staying overnight there. This trip did.
Worship team practice starts at 6 PM on Saturday night. So around 5:15 I left my house with backpack and violin in tow, ready to spend the weekend out in Huacarpay. I got on a bus that completely freaked me out, because it was just me and the driver the entire way (20 minutes or so from my house) out to Huacarpay. Normally, the bus is quite full (to say the least) and there is, in addition to the driver, a cobrador who collects the bus fares from everyone. I was praying quite fervently and singing worship songs to calm my nerves. I also had the sense that someone was praying for me right then too. If someone was impressed to pray for me at around 6:30 PA time on June 14th, I'd love to know about it. Honestly, the driver could have done anything, if he'd have had a mind to. I definitely felt the presence of God on that trip.
After an uneventful, though unnerving trip out to Huacarpay, I arrived at church 10 minutes early, only to find that I was the only one there. So I walked down the street to Hermana Rene´s house (who is also on the worship team). Practice ended up happening around her table around 8:00, after a yummy supper and some good fellowship time.
Sunday morning I got to play with the worship team for the first time. It was a blessing to be up there with the rest of the team, praising God in Spanish, Quechua and violin. I was blessed also to have the privilege of seeing the miraculous and beautiful, if simple, wedding of Valentin and Manuela.
Valentin and Manuela are two older people - probably in their seventies. They are very poor and have quite an interesting story. They, as many people do here, have been living together without being married for years and years. Manuela was diagnosed several years ago with cancer and it has spread through her body. It´s just a matter of time, the doctors say. She has cancer in her eye as well and wears a patch over the eye. The church has a strong health program in Huacarpay and a health representative from the church has been working with her for about 2 years now, changing the eye patch. Through the witness of the church and the health representative, Manuela has come to know Jesus. At the beginning of this year Valentin, who used to be a witch, got some kind of infection in his foot, which spread to his leg and became infected to the bone. My friend Juana, who´s a nurse and the director of the Mennonite church health program, worked with him and gradually, miraculously, his leg was healed to the point where he can now walk on it and the wound is very small. Through the witness of Juana and another woman from the church, Valentin also came to know Jesus and dedicated his life to Jesus during a worship service this March. Last weekend he was baptized and he and Manuela expressed a desire to follow through with Jesus´commands and be married. The wedding was scheduled for this coming Sunday. However, last week, Manuela was very bad and in a lot of pain from the cancer. It was decided that it would be a good idea for them to get married now, before her mind succumbs to the influence of the cancer and she loses her rational powers. So on Sunday, as part of the worship service, Valentin and Manuela became husband and wife in a ceremony that lasted all of about 3 minutes and was entirely in Quechua (translated: I hardly understood any of it). Now Manuela and Valentin are ready to meet Jesus, thanks to the witness of the church in Huacarpay. It was the most simple and unpretentious wedding I have ever been to, but also one of the most beautiful. Which just goes to show that God truly does make all things beautiful in His time and through His servants.

I like to eat pizza

This has been quite a popular phrase in fourth grade English class the last few weeks. It all started when I asked the question "What do you like to do?" We made a whole list of things on the board - swim, dance, sing, go on trips, fly...
And then André said it: "I like to eat pizza".
Innocent enough. Simple enough. But I had no idea how those 5 words would define the next few weeks of English class. After that, things were never the same. Every day, someone would ask me "When can we make pizza in English class?" Sara said it. Ronaldo said it. Josua said it. No doubt about it - my fourth graders were going to mutiny if I denied them the opportunity to make pizza in English class. We were coming to the end of the current unit. "Maybe next month", I told them. "Maybe isn't good enough", Josua informed me. "What do you like to do", I asked on the English test. "I like is eat pizza", Sara wrote in response. I laughed out loud while grading the test, beginning to feel like the unjust judge, plagued by the widow who just would not let him alone until he did what she was asking him to do! :) (Luke 18)
And then I found it. My lifesaver! The next unit I had planned was on ancient history, focusing on Rome and Egypt. Beautifully, wonderfully, Rome happens to be in Italy, which happens to be the birthplace of pizza. As I was looking through the teacher's manual, I realized there was even a lesson on food likes, dislikes and preferences! I came to class armed with the good news. And we finally decided on a date. Tuesday, June 3 was going to be Pizza Day. Then they stopped asking and waited in eager anticipation. At last, the day came. I came to school with a market bag full of pizza supplies - bread, sauce, cheese, mushrooms, sausages, mayonnaise. Mayonnaise? On pizza? Oh yes, Peruvians are very fond of mayonnaise and I do believe that every single pizza (except for mine) had mayonnaise on it. That was Aarón's suggestion. Someone else suggested sausages (salchichas). I burst out laughing when Ada Sol, in a voice pregnant with deep longing, crooned "Ah...salchiiiichas...". They went in my bag too. Armed and ready, I entered fourth grade. The excitement level in that classroom that day was extraordinarily high. I was thankful that Dawn Weaver, one of my friends, who also happened to be a missionary in Peru for three years and the English teacher for this class last year, was visiting and offered to help out that day as well. There are three groups of four and one single desk in the classroom. So I invited them to come up three at a time, while the rest of the students looked at English and bilingual books I pulled from the school library. I was determined to make this an educational experience as well, so we focused on several phrases: "What would you like?" "Would you like __?", "I would like ___.", "Yes, please." and "No, thank you." The kids only speak English if they absolutely have to (I'm trying to change that one), but they did pretty well with it. At the end of the class there were 12 very happy students (one was absent, unfortunately) and lots of little pizzas (2 for everyone) ready to go into the church's oven downstairs.
The students still had to sit through two more 45-minute blocks of classes before recess, when they could finally eat their pizzas. When Dawn and I came up during recess with four trays of pizzas, we were met with many excited fourth graders who couldn't wait to eat their pizzas (after all, they'd been waiting for about three weeks for this). Lots of them even wanted to take one home to show and share with their families. The kids did amazingly well and the entire day was a great success. It was a wonderful bonding experience and I think I enjoyed it as much as they did! :) I grabbed some pictures. Enjoy! Provecho! (Spanish for "enjoy your food").
In order, the pictures are as follows:
Josua, André and Sara making pizzas
Miss Nancy (the fourth grade teacher), Nurieth and Ronaldo making pizzas.
One tray of pizzas ready to go into the oven (the white stringy stuff is the mayonnaise)
Crhisnna, Magna, Ada Sol and Alicia eating pizza
Josua, Sara and André eating pizza
If you'd like to see more pictures, I have some on facebook. Click here to see them.